May 15th, 2012


(no subject)

my only response to last night's House epie is to quote the guy in "Alien": this is a bug hunt, man, game over!!!

now on to more pleasant things: Chapter 7 of I Want To Ride It All Night Long (which apparently qualifies as AU now, I guess)

House giggled. "You screamed like a little girl on that rollercoaster last night, Wilson."

"Well, it was the highest one in the world." he peered into his glass. "My Mai Tai is getting a little low." He signaled for a waitress. "Could I please get another one here, and another Margarita for my friend?"

"Sure. Would you like me to get you guys some sunblock too?"

"That'd be great, thanks. God, House, you were right, they know how to treat you in Vegas. I can't believe how much I'm enjoying myself, between the partying and the shows, and--I-I still can't believe that strip joint had better deep dish pizza than what I got when we were in Chicago!"

"God, there's like about a million hot babes at this pool. You know, we still need to get you laid. Ever had a threesome?"

"Puh-lease, House, I've had lots of them, including some with women you know from the hospital. I've even been in a couple of orgies."

"Wait just a damn minute, who were you in a threesome with from the hospital?! Cuddy? 13? Amber? If you say Park I'm gonna lose it."

"I can't picture Cuddy being into that kind of thing, 13 isn't my type and I didn't date Amber long enough for threesomes to come into the picture, and as for Park, ummm, I did sleep with her but there was no one else involved."

House whooped. "You and Park! Wow!"

"Gimme a break, House, she's adorable! She was great, too!"

"Oh, really? So who was this threeway with?"

"You know Solveig Nielsen? The endocrinologist from Norway?"

"Went to Harvard med, brunette, brown eyes, really long legs? Holy crap, Wilson, who was the other lucky girl?"


"Nurse's aide, redhead, freckles, big tits? Wilson, you dog, you!" House grinned devilishly.

Wilson blushed. "There's one thing I haven't tried that I'd like to though, and you might get pissed at this so I want to warn you." He cleared his throat and House looked mildly confused.
"I've never had a threeway with a woman and another guy," he went on in a much quieter voice. "I don't know how you feel about that, and this might be the rum and all the med pot we smoked back in our room talking, but---uhhhhhhhh...."

House almost whispered, "You're not joking, are you." He said this as a statement, not a question.

Wilson shook his head slowly. Neither of them noticed the waitress coming back silently and leaving their drink refills and a tube of sunblock on the table.

House looked pensive. "You know, I don't have any problem with that."

Wilson whispered, "As long as it isn't pity sex. I fucking hate that."

House nodded and got out his cell phone. "Don't worry about that. The thing is, I don't want to get a hooker for this because I don't know any Vegas hookers and I want to be sure we don't get our wallets lifted, so I'm gonna call a very hot lady who is definitely NOT a hooker. She lives here in Vegas, she and I got top grades in the same parasitology class at Hopkins and she covered for my ass when I almost got caught jumping rope with the cadavers' intestines. She and I had a friends with benefits sort of relationship for a while. She's great looking too, ex-stripper, reddish blond hair, great smile, very elegant athletic type."

Wilson whistled. "She sounds perfect."

"I'll see if I can talk her into it. There are a couple of snags. She's married--"

"oh, shit!"

"--to her job, Wilson! and she has an obnoxious kid, so I may have a hard time even getting ahold of her, but I'll do my best."

"What's her name?"

"Catherine Willows." Chapter 8. NC-17.
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