I Know This Much Is True (Part 1)
Cameron and Chase were talking to House in his office when House's cell phone rang. It was the "Lust For Life" by Iggy Pop ringtone.
"Chase, shouldn't we wait until House finishes this conversation?"
"Forget it, let's get out of here. I know that ringtone. Dr. Fucknuckle is gonna talk to Yoko for bloody ages."
"Hi, sugarlump, I'm not calling you in the middle of pulling weird things out of people's butts, am I?"
(chortle) "Close enough, I was talking to Chase and Cameron."
"Is Chase still calling me 'Yoko'? The nerve of that guy, he listens to fucking Bjork all the time, apparently he thinks it's only OK to scream on a bunch of albums if you look like some fucking Disney pixie. Anyway, I was calling to let you know I got your airline ticket. Thank you! I'm really looking forward to seeing you."
"I'm really looking forward to making you come so hard you scream like a lunatic."
"House, you old honey dipper, you. Anything interesting going on in freaky disease land? How's Wilson?"
"I don't even wanna talk to him right now."
"(oh god)...What happened this time?"
"It's just the usual bullshit about him not being honest with anybody, including himself, about him and me. I'm not asking him for some sort of ceremony with cake and flowers and all that happy horseshit, just an acknowledgment that he's bi. I've been out as bi for years!"
"Are you supposed to say 'out' if you're talking about being bi as opposed to being gay?"
"You said 'out' when you were talking about your family not knowing you're an atheist."
"You've got a point. I can't see either of you partying at Pride with me in San Fran, though. He's too inhibited for starters. I may be ruler-straight but if the gay dudes and lesbians are gonna boogie, I'm Ms. Party Girl. You're more Mr. Sit In A Darkened Room With A Bottle Of Scotch."
"That's DOCTOR Sit In A Darkened Room With A Bottle Of Scotch, thank you very much. Anyway, I've decided I'm forcing the issue."
"What do you mean?"
"I mean I'm getting Jimmy-poo out of the closet if I have to wedge him out with a crowbar."